So I hit up Target this morning with one thing on my mind – “I want the Mattel Elite series 1 CM Punk figure.” Ok, that and I needed batteries for my camera before I head out to tonight’s Empire State Wrestling show. In any event, I got my figure. I wanted it because it has virtually the same articulation as the Jakks Deluxe Aggression figures, but with way more attention to detail. I’ll tell you, this figure looks phenomenal. Now, I know what you’re probably thinking. “Oh, he’s going to complain because the Pepsi and Cobra logos and the word ‘SPITFIRE’ are missing.” Well, you’re thinking wrong. Those are understandable omissions on an otherwise flawless figure. No, it’s not my new CM Punk figure that I’ve taken issue with – it’s the FlexForce figures that come with tons of accessories. You see, they had CM Punk and The Undertaker in that series with a glaring omission from each. The following is a picture of the CM Punk FlexForce figure.
click for full size
Look ma! No tattoos! None. This is a CM Punk action figure that costs over $10, and there are no tattoos at all. I didn’t snap a picture of The Undertaker figure from this same series, but it’s also lacking arm ink. Interestingly enough, the ForceFlex series that didn’t come with any accessories had sketches of their tattoos – not nearly as detailed as the Elite series figures, but at least on par with what Jakks had given us over the years.
The Elite series figures are awesomely detailed, and I definitely plan on trying to pick up the Edge and Undertaker figures when I have the extra cash. I definitely won’t be earmarking any money towards inked Superstars in the FlexForce series anytime soon.
Please, please, please tell me that somebody got fired for introducing these terribly produced CM Punk slippers into the marketplace. It’s a poor excuse for an iron on transfer. No wonder I came across them at a closeout store for six bucks.
Wrestling-Radio.com, a great site for wrestling news that doesn’t bombard you with popups and preloading site ads, recently featured a couple of our images (namely, the John Cena sneakers from “I’m Not Making This Up” and the MVP as WWE Champion picture from “‘5th Grader’ Knows It’s WWE History”), unbeknown to us. Apparently, they got them via e-mail from people who didn’t bother to tell them where, exactly, they got these images. Wrestling-Radio.com has since given us credit for the photos, which I personally took with my cell phone, and I’m giving them permission to keep them up – but please, if anybody reading this site is going to take our images and send them off to another wrestling site, please make sure you give us credit.
MVP was on the half-hour version of “Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader” recently. When he entered the classroom, the following graphic popped up on the screen.
"MVP is the longest reigning WWE World Champion!"
You know, I always thought to be the longest reigning World Champion, you’d have to win a World Championship. “5th Grader” is more educational than I thought!
I found this DVD on the shelves of a local WalMart, and something just didn’t seem right. The title of this DVD is WWE Legends of Wrestling – “Heatseekers.” Take a look at the cover.
Legends of Wrestling is a fitting title, I mean, look who’s on the cover – Jerry “The King” Lawler, Junk Yard Dog, Sgt. Slaughter, “Nature Boy” Ric Flair, and… Marcus Alexander “Buff” Bagwell? Seriously? Buff Bagwell? Is this a misprint? Ah, WalMart, you never fail to provide entertaining wrestling products.
I hit up the local WalMart today to pick up an air mattress, since falling asleep on the floor during iMPACT! this past Thursday left me with a bruised hip and a sore enough back that I couldn’t even close my car door without cringing. What the hell is wrong with this world when Kevin Nash can work matches without hurting himself every week and I can’t even watch TNA’s show without being in pain the next day? Anyways, that’s irrelevant to the story.
So I’m at Wally World, and happened to pass by the sneaker section when I saw something that would probably wind up on WrestleCrap’s “Someone Bought This” section. Instead of jumping straight to my e-mail and sending a message to RD Reynolds, I remembered I had my own sports-entertainment satire site. Anyways, despite the what the guy whose picture is on these shoes says, I could see him. I could see him just fine. The fact remains that when I was a little kid, if there were Hulk Hogan or Ultimate Warrior shoes, I probably would’ve begged my parents for them, so this is actually a brilliant marketing move on the part of World Wrestling Entertainment.
Seriously though, John Cena sneakers (no, there weren’t old school Reebok pumps on them, sadly)?
Seriously - John Cena sneakers!
Complete with WWE logo treads!
If the image quality isn’t all that great, I apologize. I don’t make a habit of bringing my camera with me on trips to the store, so the best I can do is these camera phone shots.
Welcome to VinceRussoWatchesHisBeardGrow.com! This site was inspired by a throwaway joke in the March 6, 2009 WrestleCrap.com update, and is operated by Fropac Entertainment, the parent company of BoredWrestlingFan.com.
Here at VRWHBG, we hope to entertain you with our unique brand of Sports Entertainment satire.
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